Stop losing yourself in relationships
Therapy for Codependency
Do You Give So Much That There's Nothing Left for You?
Are you exhausted from taking care of everyone else?
Maybe you can't say no without guilt, even when you're already stretched too thin, or perhaps you're constantly monitoring other people's moods and emotions, trying to keep everyone happy. You may be feeling resentful but unable to speak up about your own needs, or simply realizing you don't even know who you are outside of what others need from you.
Whatever it is that you're experiencing, you're beginning to notice the impact of this in every area of your life:
Saying yes to requests you don't want to fulfill, then feeling upset with yourself and the other person
Feeling responsible for other people's feelings, problems, and happiness—like it's your job to fix everything
Getting stuck trying to get someone to see something they don’t want to or aren’t able to see.
Losing touch with your own desires, needs, and identity because you're so focused on others
Staying in relationships that drain you or accepting treatment you know isn't okay because you're afraid of conflict or abandonment
Why EMDR and Brainspotting Are Game-Changers for Codependency
You've probably tried to change these patterns before. You've read the books, you know you need boundaries, you've even rehearsed what you'd say—and then the moment comes and you freeze. The guilt overwhelms you. The fear of conflict takes over. You give in again, and nothing changes.
This isn't about willpower or trying harder.
What Makes Brainspotting and EMDR Different:
EMDR and Brainspotting don't just help you understand your patterns—they help you release them.
Talk therapy can help you understand why you people please or struggle with boundaries and give you strategies, but when your nervous system keeps getting hijacked and tells you it is dangerous to put yourself first, (that you might get hurt or abandoned) it’s hard to actually put those strategies and boundaries to good use.
EMDR and Brainspotting can help your nervous system feel different. It’s not about just forcing yourself to act differently while your nervous system is protesting…it’s about healing old wounds at the root so your body now feels safe to be yourself and capable of setting boundaries.
It can feel easier to set boundaries and care for yourself. Let’s chat about how we can get you some relief!
Here’s what becomes possible
The guilt that floods you when setting boundaries begins to dissolve. Instead of that feeling of "I'm selfish" every time you consider your own needs, you feel calm and clear when saying no.
The fear of abandonment loses its grip. That panic you feel when someone seems disappointed in you starts to fade. You'll process the core wounds that convinced you that you're only lovable when you're useful, and your nervous system finally learns you're safe to disappoint people sometimes.
You stop automatically scanning everyone else's emotions. That exhausting hypervigilance—constantly monitoring if people are upset, trying to manage everyone's feelings shifts. Your brain rewires itself to know you're not responsible for other people's emotional states.
Saying "no" starts to feel possible, even natural. The old programming that made boundaries feel dangerous gets reprocessed. You'll be able to set limits without the overwhelming anxiety, without the fear of losing connection every time you stand up for yourself.
You reconnect with who you actually are. As we process the trauma and beliefs that taught you to abandon yourself, you can rediscover your own preferences, desires, and voice beyond just the version of you that tries to keep everyone happy.
Therapy for Codependency Can Help
It may feel impossible now, but you can set boundaries without guilt. You can care for others without abandoning yourself. You can rediscover who you are beyond what you do for others. I’d love to help you get there.
Therapy for codependency helps you:
Identify where your codependent patterns come from—often rooted in childhood experiences where your worth became tied to caretaking, pleasing others, or managing chaos
Process and release the beliefs keeping you stuck using Brainspotting and EMDR, addressing the core wounds that make saying "no" feel dangerous or make your needs feel invalid
Learn to establish healthy boundaries and reconnect with yourself so you can love others without losing yourself in the process.
Codependency isn't weakness—it's a survival strategy that probably developed from relationships that weren’t mutual. These strategies once protected you but now keep you from the fulfilling, balanced relationships you deserve.
You can love others without losing yourself
You don't have to keep sacrificing yourself to keep the peace or earn love. Let's talk about how I can help you establish boundaries, rediscover yourself, and create balanced relationships.
Schedule your free 20-minute consultation today.
Questions?
FAQs
-
A: Our sessions focus on understanding your relationship patterns and helping you reclaim your sense of self. We'll explore where you learned to prioritize everyone else's needs over your own—often tracing back to childhood dynamics where you had to be the caretaker or peacekeeper. Then we use Brainspotting and EMDR to process the underlying beliefs and fears that make boundaries feel impossible—like "I'm only lovable if I'm helpful" or "saying no means I'm selfish." We'll also support you in learning to set healthy boundaries.
-
A: EMDR and Brainspotting can work fast, sometimes giving significant relief in just a few sessions. With that said, many clients get encouraged from the relief they can feel quickly and benefit from longer term work to go deeper and heal more fully. The length of therapy depends on what your goals are, how ingrained these patterns are, and how much trauma you’ve been through, and so therapy could take 15-25 sessions or more. My ultimate goal is to help you feel more empowered to be more yourself.
-
A: If you find yourself constantly putting others first, struggling to say no, feeling responsible for other people's emotions, losing yourself in relationships, or staying in situations that hurt you because you're afraid of being alone or causing conflict—you likely have codependent patterns. Therapy for codependency is especially effective for empathic, caring people who were often parentified as children, grew up in chaotic or emotionally neglectful homes, or learned early that their value came from what they could do for others. During our free consultation, we can explore your goals and relationship patterns to determine if you could benefit from working together.
-
A: Schedule a free 20-minute consultation call. We'll talk about your relationship patterns, what ways you lose touch with yourself and put ohers first, and what having healthy boundaries would look like for you. I'll explain how Brainspotting and EMDR can help you release the guilt and fear that keep you stuck in codependency, and we'll determine if we're a good fit. If we decide to move forward, we'll schedule your first session and begin your journey toward loving others without losing yourself.